the emerging journey

The heart swells as this journey emerges. I need to play down my expectations of the implant. This week, as I get ready for surgery (9 days to go), I have been in a frenzy researching peoples experiences with the CI, particularily from prelingually deaf people like myself. Over the years I have always been curious about cochlear implantation and would seek out information from the recipients, but right now the nervous energy is raging inside me and I seek to suppress it through the encouraged and experienced eyes (or ears??) of the implanted and activated people.

The feedback I get has been amazing. I have joined a forum provided by http://www.cochlear.com/ (the company for which product I will be implanted. At present, BC will only implant from Cochlear.) The experiences shared in the forum have been far and wide, ranging from personal struggle, to success. The most encouraging thing to me is I have not sensed any sign of defeat. No one seems to regret having the CI. I am thankful for the ongoing advice and encouragement I get, ranging from family and friends, the professionals involved, to the recipients themselves. Another audiologist from my hometown in Portland, OR, who is now selling cochlear implants wrote to me upon hearing of my surgery date. She and I go 20+ years back, as we worked at the same oral school and because I know and trust her, her insight is vital to me. It is her kind but realistic words that ring in the back of my mind that bring me down to a reality check as I feel overwhelmed with excitement and expectations are running high..

She shares: …it is never as easy as others may paint and you have lots of work to do to make the most of this technology. I admire you for the decision you have made and support you in any way I can as you work toward success with the sound that is not like anything you have heard before. I wish for patience for you and a feeling of joy with even the smallest of steps.